Post-baby hair chop
I always think that I'm not going to cut my hair. Post-wedding hair chop? Definitely not for me. I love my long hair. Its so pretty and great. I'm never going to cut it short again, because I always hate it, and why would I do that to myself?
-- 3 days after honeymoon--
Yeah... it gotsta go. Chop.
You'd think I would have learned by now... but then we wouldn't have the fun of discussing my idiocy on the blog, now would we.
I had no intentions of cutting my hair post-baby. I was petrified of getting 'mom hair', and thus decided to keep my lengthy locks firmly attached to my head. I had nightmares about the SNL skit about the 'mom cut' (if you haven't seen it- look it up). I was 100% positive and sure that I was going to keep my hair long. (Photo credit to the incomparable Haley Rowell)
You see where this is going, don't you?
It was one of those things that I knew was a mistake before I even did it. I read other people's accounts of how they hated their short hair. I remembered vividly how I hated my short hair each time I had it. But I was tired of high buns and my hair smacking the little human in the face every time it was in anything other than a high bun.
So I did it anyway.
Something about the combination of hormones, exhaustion, and the desperate desire for something in life to feel easy led me to decide it was time. So I went to some random salon close to my house and requested they cut my hair off above my shoulders.
And then I spent the next three months laughing at myself for my naivety. Because when you have a tiny human to take care of, 'this time will be different' isn't what you want to hang your hat (or hair) on. I knew it would be a mistake, but it was just one of those mistakes that I needed to make.
As will you, if you are reading this in an attempt to decide if you want to cut off your hair. My advice will be virtually meaningless. So instead of talking you out of it- I'm going to tell you the three things I wish I had done slightly differently when I proceeded with the chop.
1). If you want to be able to make a ponytail, make sure that you check the length before they cut it. I told the lady 'I have a 2 month old, so ponytails are very important.' She held up a length and said "How about this?" I mistakenly assumed she knew for certain that the length she was showing me would make a sturdy, firm ponytail that didn't drip the little hairs out the bottom to tickle my neck and make me crazy. I assumed incorrectly... and have been sentenced to a purgatory of neck tickling ever since. Maybe just go ahead and add an inch or two to the length you think you want. You can always cut off more... but you can't make the tickling disappear once you've cut off too much.
2). Go to someone you know and trust. I have never had great luck with hair dressers, but I have one that I kind of like. She happened not to be working the weekend I decided to get my hair cut, so I went to someone else. RED FLAG- if you are so impatient to chop your hair off that you won't wait for someone good to do it... maybe you need to go buy some new shoes or take a bubble bath instead. Because you are not thinking this through.
3). Just because something seems like it'll be easier doesn't mean it will be. I thought to myself 'I can just straighten short hair, or pull it back in a nice light ponytail. It'll be so easy.' This was a humorous thing to think since I never, EVER straighten my hair. Ponytails are great, but if you are used to wearing your hair high and suddenly have to wear it lower, you might get headaches. Or if you are used to being able to braid... hold on to your hats, folks. Literally. Bust out the hats because braids in short hair are not super feasible in Oklahoma wind.
I thought of a fourth thing, too. Baby hairs. Don't forget to consider the baby hairs. Your hair, which might have been all pretty and thick during pregnancy could start to fall out. Leaving you with very strange hairs that stand up in the front of your head, constantly tickling you no matter what you do. The best thing I have found to do with them are small french braids... which would be easier if the rest of my hair was longer and/or not currently attempting to make friends with my shirt collar.
There you have it. Don't do it- but since you will anyway, I wish you luck. And a bit of hope for after you've done it... you will care significantly less that you used to. Because you have a squishy little human to love and their little grabby hands are going to pull your hair out by the chunk anyway. Give me a ponytail every day until the end of time... I'm pretty much ok with that as soon as the tiny human gives me a grin and slobbers on my neck.
-- 3 days after honeymoon--
Yeah... it gotsta go. Chop.
You'd think I would have learned by now... but then we wouldn't have the fun of discussing my idiocy on the blog, now would we.
I had no intentions of cutting my hair post-baby. I was petrified of getting 'mom hair', and thus decided to keep my lengthy locks firmly attached to my head. I had nightmares about the SNL skit about the 'mom cut' (if you haven't seen it- look it up). I was 100% positive and sure that I was going to keep my hair long. (Photo credit to the incomparable Haley Rowell)
You see where this is going, don't you?
It was one of those things that I knew was a mistake before I even did it. I read other people's accounts of how they hated their short hair. I remembered vividly how I hated my short hair each time I had it. But I was tired of high buns and my hair smacking the little human in the face every time it was in anything other than a high bun.
Something about the combination of hormones, exhaustion, and the desperate desire for something in life to feel easy led me to decide it was time. So I went to some random salon close to my house and requested they cut my hair off above my shoulders.
And then I spent the next three months laughing at myself for my naivety. Because when you have a tiny human to take care of, 'this time will be different' isn't what you want to hang your hat (or hair) on. I knew it would be a mistake, but it was just one of those mistakes that I needed to make.
As will you, if you are reading this in an attempt to decide if you want to cut off your hair. My advice will be virtually meaningless. So instead of talking you out of it- I'm going to tell you the three things I wish I had done slightly differently when I proceeded with the chop.
1). If you want to be able to make a ponytail, make sure that you check the length before they cut it. I told the lady 'I have a 2 month old, so ponytails are very important.' She held up a length and said "How about this?" I mistakenly assumed she knew for certain that the length she was showing me would make a sturdy, firm ponytail that didn't drip the little hairs out the bottom to tickle my neck and make me crazy. I assumed incorrectly... and have been sentenced to a purgatory of neck tickling ever since. Maybe just go ahead and add an inch or two to the length you think you want. You can always cut off more... but you can't make the tickling disappear once you've cut off too much.
2). Go to someone you know and trust. I have never had great luck with hair dressers, but I have one that I kind of like. She happened not to be working the weekend I decided to get my hair cut, so I went to someone else. RED FLAG- if you are so impatient to chop your hair off that you won't wait for someone good to do it... maybe you need to go buy some new shoes or take a bubble bath instead. Because you are not thinking this through.
3). Just because something seems like it'll be easier doesn't mean it will be. I thought to myself 'I can just straighten short hair, or pull it back in a nice light ponytail. It'll be so easy.' This was a humorous thing to think since I never, EVER straighten my hair. Ponytails are great, but if you are used to wearing your hair high and suddenly have to wear it lower, you might get headaches. Or if you are used to being able to braid... hold on to your hats, folks. Literally. Bust out the hats because braids in short hair are not super feasible in Oklahoma wind.
I thought of a fourth thing, too. Baby hairs. Don't forget to consider the baby hairs. Your hair, which might have been all pretty and thick during pregnancy could start to fall out. Leaving you with very strange hairs that stand up in the front of your head, constantly tickling you no matter what you do. The best thing I have found to do with them are small french braids... which would be easier if the rest of my hair was longer and/or not currently attempting to make friends with my shirt collar.
There you have it. Don't do it- but since you will anyway, I wish you luck. And a bit of hope for after you've done it... you will care significantly less that you used to. Because you have a squishy little human to love and their little grabby hands are going to pull your hair out by the chunk anyway. Give me a ponytail every day until the end of time... I'm pretty much ok with that as soon as the tiny human gives me a grin and slobbers on my neck.
